1. They are scary machines.
2. The first few hours you will feel like you've developed a case of Haemorrhoids - not that I've had haemorrhoids to compare, you understand...
3. Riding uphill is a bitch
4. Just coz it don't look uphill don't mean it aint uphill!
5.You are not as fit as you think you are!!
6. Cars are much bigger and scarier when you are on a bike than on terra firma
7. Bikes are expensive.
8. It will take ages before you even begin to look cool on the bike. Ages. Especially with your one size fits all helmet and high visibility poly -something jacket.
9. People steal whole bikes, bike parts, brakes etc. Get a strong chain and lock up.
10. You will sweat. Alot.

So, I got a bike...

Pray for me. I am not good at it!

Ah..you knew it was coming sooner or later. A post about what is quickly becoming the fairer sex...I tell you, they're all becoming really soft in the middle and for a "traditional" woman like me - not barefoot and pregnant traditional but more I'd like to feel taken care of traditional- its worrying.

But again, that's not the point of this post. The point is, after years and years of worrying and fretting I have finally made peace with the idea that I may be one of those women who was destined to be alone just that little bit longer. When I was younger it more than irked me - it gnawed at me from the inside out, and yes, I confess I became bitter. But I'm older now, and wiser I think, and I've realised that even if I wanted it there is very little room in my life for a man right now. I still have so many things to figure out and achieve before ...well before something significant but I don't know what that is right now.

The fact is, I am not a supermodel, or even remotely close to being confused for one. At my best, I could probably pass for alright to look at but usually, the best adjective to describe me is plain. And believe me that's fine. I like to think of myself as one of those people created to remind beautiful people of what it could be like. :-) The most attractive thing about me is not physical, and in this day in age very few people have the patience to delve into personalities to discover what that is.

The end result is that in my entire life I have never managed to get a single guy my age to look twice in my direction. Many friends, not a single man. Or potential man. Like I said, when I was younger it bothered me somewhat, particularly when it got to the stage when I was the only one amongst my friends that was still perenially single. I know that I am a good person, or I try to be a good person, and I think I'd make a decent girlfriend but no one seemed interested in giving me a shot.

There has however been no shortage of dirty old men making passes at me. Its disgusting. Someone old enough to be my fathers older brother asking me out, or trying to get me to go out with them. In the last two months, one took me out for a coffee (before I figured out his game - what can I say, I thought he was a lecturer discussing some class stuff. He wasn't. I left.) another wanted to walk me home from work, and yesterday a (fat) old man asked me to go back to Nigeria with him. Tres, tres bizarre.

I think its because of my personality. I try to be pleasant and charming, because its part of the job description, and they think that I'm flirting with them. Needless to say they got played like a deck of cards - homegirl does NOT play 'dat.

Lately I've been wondering if in my attempts to avoid becoming a cold hard bitch I have become to soft and I am "letting" such things happen. I am in the process of being bullied into a house that I can't afford because I am "afraid" to say no to the girl who wants me to move in with her. She was one of the first people I met when I got here and she's been really nice to me, but I just haven't got the money, or the inclination to go out and get it. But like I said, its getting harder and harder for me to say no as I grow softer in the middle.

I've decided to just say no from now on. I can't keep sending mixed signals and it seems that people only hear things when you say them out loud. SO here goes;

If you are a dirty old man reading this, please be warned that I have had enough - I won't take kindly to the next one.

Be good, be kind, but don't be afraid to say no.

Hey all

We are rolling into the Easter time. I feel almost obligated to venture off into a rant about the commercialisation of religious Holiday, but I guess you all have heard it all, and I am too tired to wring it out of myself. What I will say is that its sad that most parents would rather have their children believing in a giant rabbit distributing eggs (of all things) or a flying tiny person harvesting their teeth (to what end, kids should ask) than a loving Saviour who would give up his life to save theirs. Or any God for that matter. But that's just me. There is absolutely no obligation to agree with that.

Moving on...Easter. Rumour has it that I am supposed to be on vacation. I tell you I've worked harder in the last three weeks than I probably did all last month. Still working the obligatory two jobs, and still in a huge amount of debt. I think I've just gotten to that stage where you realise that there is nothing that you can do other than ride the wave and see where it takes you. This week a British surfer rode a bore for 77 minutes (surfing lingo - some kind of wave)to take the world record. I feel like that guy, and I am still riding the bore and waiting for the thrill ride to end.

My feet are killing me!! Because I am flatfooted, I tend to wear out my shoes unevenly, and this combined with the unearthly amount of walking I do, and the fact that both my jobs involve being on my feet for at least three hours (sometimes up to 5) means that my calf muscles are better defined than they have been for ages. I feel like I have developed some form of DVT because of all the pangs in my feet. Also my big toes are sore because of the pressure and each time I stretch any part of my foot, it makes that snap noise. Its frightening stuff folks. More so because my next "break" is in no less than five weeks.

Ah, mais c'est la vie. Il n y'a pas personne qui a dit a moi que il serai facile. Mais, chaque fois, je souhaites pour une vacance - une vrai vacance - ou je peux me rester.

Anyway, its not all doom and gloom. One of my jobs is really cool. Its minimum wage but I work in this huge aquarium and work with all these wonderful animals!! Green sea turtles, cow nose rays, Japanese spider crabs, Asian otters, red bellied piranhas, poison dart frogs... the list just goes on and on. Its amazing and I really enjoy it. Still it is pretty exhausting to be on my feet for five hours.

And the other job gets me free food so yaay!!

Life is better.

"you can only switch on the lights if you are standing inside the room."

Think about it. Happy Easter.

P.S. I found jeans that fit...AT THE GAP!! Ha, ha, ha - its funny when you think how anti commercialism and anti globalisation and just generally anti I am!! Ah, the Gap. Who knew? (Probably their millions of customers!)

"(keep in) Mind the Gap" The London Underground, 2006, London

Properly referenced and everything...

Hi all!! Wow , took a little break there didn't I. I've been busy being a student the last few weeks, and its paying off ever so slightly. My grades are up, my stress levels are down and my skin looks good!! (the marker of a truly happy woman, according to my flatmates' tabloids). The secret - ignore your problems and hope they go away!! HA ha, seriously, that is exactly what I have been doing and now I fear it is time to return to the real world. Its been fun though. Got active in a society, got a series of 1sts in my essay (i.e. the highest mark band)started eating more fruit -really, it helps and I can tell the difference!! Ah, it was a dream. And now that I've experienced it, I want to have it all the time.

What that essentially means is that once I need to get through this year and then move out of the uni and find seriously mediocre housing. Just for two years, live in absolute poverty and save up some money. I just need for housing/money to not be a problem for two years, to get my degree and then get gone. I really want to get as much from my university life as possible, but all the while keeping in mind that I am here to study, you know? Wouldn't it be a shame if I saved up all the money in the world but didn't get what I came here to get?

That said, my different jobs have been a roller coaster ride of experience. I am up to number 5 now. Mostly because 95% of the time I have been working two jobs (which still doesn't get me out of debt). You always read about all these amazing people who do this kind of stuff when they're in uni, but you never really think that when you're doing it its that amazing. And it really isn't. Because it has to be done, and I think all of us when put under the right mix of pressure will do whatever because it has to be done.

I don't think I am remarkable - I believe that everyone who sets their mind to it can be the most that they can be. I do believe that the God I serve is remarkable, and if I place my hope and trust in him I can maybe some day aspire to greatness. But right now, I'm just happy to be happy, y'know?

Quite a ramble there - sometimes completely unconnected. But that's the way things stand in my life at the moment. All the random bits are slowly tying together, which means that sometimes you follow a certain line and it leads to something else, and then something else - and then just when you think its all going to make sense, the line stops. So not everything is connected, not all the loose ends tie together into one neat pattern. But that's alright. I can diggit.

Stay outta trouble.